Posts in Communication
How parents can talk to their children about sexual education.

Q: Lucy (10) and Ben (12) are great kids, and get on well with Ian and I, but puberty is approaching. I want to keep the channels of communication open between us, but I know teenagers often shut their parents out. I would love it if they felt they could talk to us if something concerns them, especially in the area of sexuality, but I feel pretty ignorant and at a loss about modern sex – sexual orientation, porn, STIs, sexting and so on. How can I get better informed, and springboard this kind of conversation?

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5 Naughty Ways to Have More Fun in Bed

A: Great question, thanks for asking. Relationships take work, no matter if you are in the beginning or down the track. The difference is in the beginning we don’t see that the work we put in is effort. Making that effort at any stage doesn’t have to be a drag and is a great thing for your relationship. Inject some imaginative and goofy play into your sex life to increase the fun levels.

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My new partner has some habits I find intensely irritating

Q: I’m 55, and have started seeing a woman. We are compatible on most levels, and I see the potential for a long-term relationship. We’re from different cultural backgrounds, which we both find appealing. However, she has some eating habits I find intensely irritating – slurping her food, eating quickly and urgently, and talking with her mouth full. I’m worried about the impression she’ll make on my family and friends. I suffer from a degree of misophonia, and am not able to tolerate some sounds. I don’t want this to be a deal-breaker. What can I do?

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How will I find a partner if I don't enjoy sex?

Never forget that a woman’s pleasure is as important as a man’s. He can be as ready to go as soon as he has an erection. Women need more time. During arousal, the blood vessels become engorged, and the woman gets an internal erection. The body releases natural lubricants, and the vaginal canal lengthens. Vigorous intercourse when you are not aroused can easily become painful. Enduring painful sex acts like aversion therapy

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5 ways to stop Motherhood Ruining Your Sex Life - reconnect with yourself & your pleasure.

Motherhood can feel like a marathon, our energy going into our children, work, house, friends, family, portraying the perfect life to fill our social media. Our lives and our children’s lives are more connected and scheduled than ever before. Some would argue that motherhood has been taken to a higher energy, time and focus level than ever before. This makes sense when we are caring for our newborns but not as our children grow. If our energy is totally devoted to our children, house, and work what is left for us and for our sexual/intimate lives? Why have we put our sex lives on hold as if it is not an important part of our life or our relationship?

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How to handle the laws of emotion.

Q: Sam and I have always worked on our relationship, reading books, and attending workshops and seminars. We've resolved a range of problems over the years, but there is one destructive pattern that seems impossible to change. Sometimes, something is said or done that triggers an extreme reaction in one, or both of us. The anger, fear, and blame expressed is so intense you'd think we hated each other. What's going on?

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We should be happy together, but we're not.

Q: Ruth and I are coming up for our 10th wedding anniversary. We have two great kids (8 and 5), we both work, have a nice home, and should be happy together, but we’re not. We went through some tough times with health issues, a period of unemployment, and my mother’s transition into a nursing home, and, now things are calmer, we can barely talk to one another without it turning into a row. Can we get back on track, or is divorce inevitable?

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Self Love is the Most Radical Form of Self Care - 5 Health Benefits of Masturbation

I bet you are not surprised that a sex toy shop is going gaga for Masturbation month. If you’ve been hanging around here a while, you probably know that we are about more than just sales we are are all about your sexual wellness. A big reason why we love May so much is because of the health benefits of the month that promotes masturbation and we’re huge fans of self-pleasure. Did you know that according to Indiana University’s National Survey Of Sexual Health And Behavior, more than half of American adults say they masturbate up to four times a week. I wonder how often us Aussies enjoy considering we are among the highest consumers of sex toys (adjusted for population size) in the world.

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I am turned off by the thought of physical intimacy.

Q: I think our society is obsessed with sex. The pressure to look sexually attractive, same sex relationships, sexual abuse, assault and harassment, controversy about contraception and abortion, infidelity, sex-ed in schools, worries about porn, or STIs … it seems to be everywhere you look. I think I must be a freak. I am not sexually attracted to anyone, of any gender, or body type. I have had deep friendships, bordering on what I suppose is love, but I have absolutely no inclination to become physically intimate with people. Is there something wrong with me?

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I'm drawn to both of them but don't want to ruin the friendship.

Q: My singing teacher, Greg, is charismatic and kind. When he met Ann, he introduced us, and I was happy he'd met such a lovely woman. We've all become friends. Ann's supported me with my depression, and Greg's given freely of his advice and encouragement. They take me out, and see me individually, have taken me into hospital, and done things beyond mere friendship. Ann's said she loves me, and …

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What went on at the office party: Coping with the corrosive effects of gossip

Q: I am part of a large social group that I won't identify. Last month, we had our annual Christmas party, which got pretty lively. Now there's a story going around that one of the female members, who doesn't usually drink a lot, was drunk, and was seen fellating a married man in the car park. I feel very uncomfortable about this gossip because it is such a great group of people, and I know the woman, but I don't know how to react.

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5 Tips For Talking To Your Teens About Sex & Sexuality For A Positive And Healthy Sexual Journey

Be Brave - Teens need lots of information-more than you (and they) might realise or be willing to discuss. Rest assured the evidence tells us time and time again that young people who are given adequate, accurate information at home and school have better outcomes later on in life such as less teen pregnancies and less STI’s. Many delay sexual intercourse to a later age.

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5 tips for self care but not as you know it.

No matter how many times someone tells you self care is not selfish it is an important part of managing your symptoms and improving your wellbeing that little voice inside you still screams, what about this and that, we should do this for such and such, you don’t have time you have to……… We are socialised to care for others and self care is an indulgent use of time. For others self care is a sign that they can’t keep up and it is a sign of weakness. However, a very practical illustration of the importance of putting yourself first and one that most of us can intellectually process when the plane is going down you put your own mask on first then you help others including your children. If you can’t breathe you can’t help others, just as if you don’t take time to care for yourself you can’t do all those ‘should’ things for others in your life.

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‘‘Remind yourself that you also have habits that others might find annoying.’’

Q: Ray and I haven’t been getting along well lately, and I feel irritated and annoyed by almost everything he does – the way he sips his coffee, hums under his breath when concentrating, leaves shaving hair in the sink, and the way he bunches up the damp tea towel, and drops it in the draining rack. He’s actually a great guy, and even writing this makes me feel like a mean, hypercritical nit-picker. What is wrong with me?

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How can using a vibrator during sex increase intimacy in your relationship?

You might ask how can intimacy be increased by using a vibrating piece of silicone or plastic? Intimacy has been defined as a situation in which you have a close relationship with someone in which you do or say things that you would share with someone you are close to. The simple answer is shared pleasure and the building of connection when you observe that shared pleasure. Add in a little bit of fun, novelty, spice and variety to your relationship and that little vibrator has its own magic.

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The three words that could keep your relationship alive.

Q: My partner and I have a great life, and a terrific family, but it feels like something’s missing. We both rush around with work, kids’ activities, and our own clubs and hobbies. We rarely fight, but we also rarely connect as a couple. Sometimes it seems like we live parallel lives, and I’m not sure what we would do if we were left alone for any length of time. How can we revive our relationship?

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